Rebirth Online World

Creating, Telling, Sharing Dreams

I Will Return Again

Chapter 014 - “Of Course, My Answer Is No!”


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Edited 4/9/19 Pyrenose

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(TN: Warning! Out-of control sea urchin obsession ahead!)

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 Today is the third day of school.

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“I like you. Please go out with me!” (Kouzenji)

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Following the directions in the letter I found in my desk, I’m on the rooftop during lunch break being confessed to by a 2nd year athlete named Kouzenji.

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The letter, which is beautifully written in pen, reads, ‘I have something to tell you, so I’ll be waiting for you on the rooftop during lunch break.’ So, this is the love letter that Mii was talking about? Undoubtedly, it is, but it could also be an invitation to ask me to join the calligraphy club. Absentmindedly, I think about this sudden development. I can’t help it. No matter what I look like now, I have no confidence since I’ve never received a love letter before.

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“May I ask for your reply?” (Kouzenji)

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He asks while blushing slightly. I’m not interested in a man one tiny bit, and I begin to reply to him.

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“Yes. Of course, my answer is no!” (Tsukasa)

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I declare loud and clear, while clenching my fist in front of my chest. Immediately after I reply to him, his face pales. His mouth falls open, as if his jaw was broken, when I drive him further into a corner and tell him, “Even as a friend.”

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Did I say too much? I regret it a little. Nevertheless, it’s rude to give a half-hearted reply and make him cling onto something. There are many girls who are better around than me. Real girls, not an ex-man. It’s a much better idea for him to go out with them. So, I make myself a demon for both of our peace of mind.

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“Why, Why? Tell me why!” (Kouzenji)

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He demands while on the verge of crying. It’s not as if I can tell him it’s because I’m a former man, even if I wanted to. I wouldn’t want to traumatize him because he ‘confessed to a man.’ Oh, this is so troublesome.

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“I’ve never dated a man, and I'm not going to go out with you!” (Tsukasa)

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I have a feeling that there is an alarm ringing in the corner of my mind, but now that I've said it, it's too late. Anyway, I hope this makes him give up on this. His eyes open wide in surprise and then his shoulders droop. He tells me, “I’m sorry,” waves his hand limply in my direction, and leaves the rooftop. I'm unsure why he gave up so easily, but it’s good that he did, which is a relief.

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The next day when I open my shoebox, there were two letters inside. After I open them, I find out they are love letters. In the classroom, I receive the second body blow of the day, this time from Ritsuka when she asks, “Tsukasa, are you not interested in men?” It’s a splendid KO blow, and I lay my head on my desk.

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Apparently, yesterday’s confession on the rooftop was witnessed by a third party. In a single day, rumors have spread from person to person and it’s quickly over dramatized to be, “Tsukasa Yoshina is a lesbian and not interested in men.” Now, some men are saying, “They are going to wake me up to the charms of the opposite sex!” and some girls are saying, “It would be better with her than a man!” I seem to have opened the door to a new world. I see. This is the result of receiving a love letter. How did things turn out this way?

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Thus, I now have one more thing to worry about.

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 ◇  ◆ ◇  ◆ ◇

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High school cafeterias everywhere are usually crowded, and Hasuike High School isn’t an exception to that rule. On the left side of the entrance, many students crowd around a table where bread and bentos are displayed. After selecting and paying for the items they want, the students head out of the cafeteria. A sign that reads, “Chocolate bread sold out”, along with several other “sold out” signs on the table are displayed.

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On the right side, there’s a long, winding line that extends all the way back to the entrance. All the students in this line are holding meal tickets.

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Taking advantage of the wisdom I’ve gained from three years of high school, I hand Ritsuka my ticket and ask her to line up. In the meantime, I look for empty seats for us while holding a glass of water.

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I was able to find seating by the window. This spot is usually taken by 3rd years, so it should rarely be used by junior students, but it’s always vacant when I come here for some reason. It's strange. Oh well, thank you for the seats.

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A few minutes later, Ritsuka arrives with our food on a tray. It seems that our orders came quickly. Receiving my food from Ritsuka, I immediately begin eating. I ordered oyakodon (Chicken and Egg Rice Bowl), which has few ingredients that I got used to eating for the last three years. It’s a bit bland, but for some reason, I like the taste and often order it.

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“Come to think of it, you didn’t bring a bento.” (Ritsuka)

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“I can't cook. Why do you ask, Ritsuka?” (Tsukasa)

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“When I make one, my parents say, 'Make one for your brother too.' I don't want to do that.” (Ritsuka)

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Ritsuka answers while eating her ramen and spilling some of the soup.

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“You don't have to make lunch if you have a large menu to choose from.” (Tsukasa)

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The cafeteria here has a large menu. I forgot their name, but a family restaurant chain that has sites across the country is employed by the school to run our cafeteria. So, the menu here is as big as a restaurants and it’s cheap.

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“What’s wrong? You’re staring at your rice bowl.” (Ritsuka)

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"Hmm… They certainly have a big menu, but it is a pity that there’s no sea urchin rice bowl. " (Tsukasa)

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“Sea urchin rice bowl?” (Ritsuka)

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“Yes. Oh, sushi is great too.” (Tsukasa)

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Ritsuka looks up at the ceiling as if thinking of something while she pauses her chopsticks and mutters, “sea urchin rice bowl…”

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“Sea urchin is delicious, but it’s expensive. It is a sumptuous dish, especially when done as sushi. Tsukasa, do you like sea urchin?” (Ritsuka)

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(TN: Might as well ask her if she likes to breathe too.)

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“Yes. It’s good raw, baked, and as an ornament, it’s even great to throw as well.” (Tsukasa)

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“Hey, no, the last part is ridiculous.” (Ritsuka)

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Ritsuka looks at me with narrowed eyes. There’s nothing wrong with it. I threw a sea urchin at Mii the other day. However, it was a plastic one.

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“Muraski sea urchin shell is good for interior decorating. You know, like Marimo or cedar balls.” (Tsukasa)

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(TN: Marimo are moss balls. In case you’re curious, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marimo )

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“Generally speaking, Marimo isn’t normally used as a decoration like cedar balls.” (Ritsuka)

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“What’s normal?” (Tsukasa)

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“Stop talking philosophically.” (Ritsuka)

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I once heard a quote from a teacher before that, “philosophy doesn’t make money.” I wanted to ask why he majored in philosophy then, but I was so engrossed by what he was saying, I never got a chance to ask. He always looked so happy while he was giving a lecture. That is something that led to my love of sea urchins. Yeah. Maybe.

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(TN: 通じる, tsuujiru, has several different meanings. I think in this instance, although, I’m not 100% sure, she’s saying his passion led to hers. The following paragraph kinda reinforces that it led to it. Alternatively, it could mean his passion spoke to hers. Japanese can be so fun at times.)

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It’s a little embarrassing that I’m so fond of sea urchins, which are a rather expensive, high-class food that I can only eat it occasionally. Therefore, it occurred to me that I can find out all I can about sea urchin to help divert me. I’m charmed by their appearance and gradually, collecting their shells, which also decorate my room, became my hobby. I know this isn’t normal, but it’s far too late at this point. Going back to normal is impossible. Sea urchins are so cute!

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“I ask every day if there is sea urchin in the cafeteria.” (Tsukasa)

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“Of course there wouldn’t be. Why would you even ask? Isn’t it too expensive?” (Ritsuka)

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“I told my mother that the prices in the cafeteria have gone up and asked her to give me more money.” (Tsukasa)

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“Twenty yen, fifty yen, will it still be worth it if the price increases by several hundred yen?” (Ritsuka)

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"I'd spend all of my pocket money." (Tsukasa)

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“You want to eat it that badly…” (Ritsuka)

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“I won’t give you a bite either.” (Tsukasa)

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Seeing me make a fist, Ritsuka mutters, “Wow.” We eat as I praise sea urchins. I finish eating a few minutes after Ritsuka. I’m a little uncomfortable, because I’m so full.

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That’s strange. I wonder if they increased the amount of food. No, there’s no change in the size of the bowl or amount of food. They are still stingy with the chicken and the egg’s size didn’t change either. Everything’s the exact same. The only difference is the condition of my stomach. In other words, “I ate too much.” That’s what happened.

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Oh, I see. I mean, it’s that. I should’ve thought about my change. I eat smaller meals since I now have a much smaller body as a woman. The fact is, my mother has reduced the amount of food in my meals, saying, “You’re smaller now and can’t eat as much.” In the end, I didn’t need more.

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Ritsuka laughs at me while I rub my stomach and groan.

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“How you look and how you act really are different. The combination is unimaginable.” (Ritsuka)

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False advertising. That phrase comes to mind.

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“Yes, I’m not what I seem and I can’t speak English.” (Tsukasa)

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"No. You’re a great friend and I’m lucky to have you." (Ritsuka)

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Rituska laughs. I feel a little silly, but I feel better now.

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“By the way, I don’t have your cell phone number yet. Why don’t we trade?” (Rituska)

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Ritsuka takes out her phone and skillfully operates it with one hand. Oh, she has a smartphone. That’s good.

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“Does yours have an infrared port?” (Ritsuka)

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She turns her phone toward me.

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“Sorry, but I don't have a cell phone.” (Tsukasa)

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When I say that, she opens her eyes wider in surprise and asks in a high-pitched tone of voice, “Seriously?” Why is it such a surprise? It’s true that most junior high and elementary school students these days have cell phones in order for parents to stay in touch with their kids to keep them safe, but there are still a few high school students, like me, who don’t have one. Surprisingly, I’m not surprised. After all, if you’re a high school student without a cell phone, you’re definitely in the minority.

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That's right, as nice as it would be to have a cell phone, it's great to have my mother to run interference. I was thankful when I got a phone call from Hayate, but that’s a different issue. Since there shouldn’t be a problem if "Tsukasa” has one, I’d definitely like to have one.

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“Really? Then let me know when you do. Can I have your house number then?” (Ritsuka)

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“Sure.” (Tsukasa)

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After writing down my house phone, I hand it to Ritsuka and she hands me her cell phone number in exchange.

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The number of a girl… Outside of family, I’ve only had Akane’s or Saki’s.

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When I look around, the number of empty seats suddenly hits me. The peak period seems to have passed. There are actually very few people remaining here, because most have finished eating and left. There are some people here, who are chatting with friends, reading, or spending their lunch break here. Ritsuka and I included as well.

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It’s much better in here with fewer people. I take out a letter set and pen I bought earlier at the shop and set it on the table in front of me.

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“Sorry, I have to write a letter.” (Tsukasa)

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“A letter? Oh, a reply to a love letter? You’re conscientious.” (Ritsuka)

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“After all, it’s bad if you don’t properly write a reply to them, right?” (Tsukasa)

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“I think it's good to reply to them. Are you turning them down?” (Ritsuka)

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“Yes.” (Tsukasa)

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“What a waste.” (Ritsuka)

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“What, the cost of the envelopes?” (Tsukasa)

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“Even better than an envelope.” (Ritsuka)

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“The cost of ballpoint pens?” (Tsukasa)

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“Well, let’s say it’s something like that.” (Ritsuka)

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Ritsuka sucks on her straw. I feel like I’m spoiled. Saying nothing, I look back down at the letter to finish writing it. A short while later, I look up at Ritsuka, who is now sitting beside me.

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“…What is it?” (Tsukasa)

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“Umm, Tsukasa's hair is beautiful. Can I touch it?” (Ritsuka)

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“Okay.” (Tsukasa)

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I reply to her as I continue with my letter. Taking the chair beside me, she reaches out and softly strokes my hair. This is a little embarrassing.

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“Isn’t it in your way? Why don’t you put it up?” (Ritsuka)

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“I can’t gather it all together and do it by myself. My mom stopped me from having it cut when I told her it was in my way and she wouldn’t let me dye it to keep from standing out.” (Tsukasa)

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“Yes. I can understand your mother’s feelings.” (Ritsuka)

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Ritsuka says while stroking the back of my hair. She then raises her hand and places it on top of my head.

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Haa~ I’m healed.” (Ritsuka)

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“Just a minute, Ritsuka.” (Tsukasa)

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“What?” (Ritsuka)

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I stare at Ritsuka and say,

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“You’re not touching my hair now, but petting my head.” (Tsukasa)

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“Oh, that’s right. I didn’t even notice.” (Ritsuka)

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What a load of bull. Totally. Why do I have to be petted like I’m a child? I look away from her and begin to clean up the table. I put the finished letter in an envelope and sealed it. Then slip it into my pocket.

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“Well, then I’ll be leaving.” (Tsukasa)

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I stand up with my tray.

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“Do your best.” (Ritsuka)

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I wave to Ritsuka and leave the cafeteria. What the hell do you mean “do my best”? To refuse someone?

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