(This chapter is sponsored by: E.W, R.H, Ingro, and hayashimoritan… thank you so much…)
Yesterday, Varn clearly has lost his mind. It hasn’t been known exactly when but it should be related to the 「arrow trap」. Right now Varn is resting in his room while Flora is trying to ask Mother Nature. As a mandragora, Flora is blessed with the knowledge passed down by her colleagues and taught by the nature but still she needs some help.
“Is that true?”
Flora seemed to be talking with no one but she is clearly conversing with the nature. Also she has found something unexpected judging by her reaction.
The next morning, she was already standing besides Varn’s bed.
“Master, there might be an answer to your condition.”
“Flora, do you know what happened to me?”
“I need to confirm it first. So can you follow me to the arena?”
The arena is referred to the 5th floor inside Varn’s dungeon. It was a level specially prepared for Varn to train against monster. They haven’t used it since Varn is learning how to deal with traps first before learning how to deal with monsters.
The two of them walked downwards and have arrived at the arena. It was a simple level without anything on it aside from a circle coliseum like building. There are seat for spectators but no one will ever used them aside from Flora for now. There are also caged fence that surrounding the fighting area in the middle. It was clearly prepared to be used to practice against monster.
“This might be early but we need to confirm my conclusion.”
“That’s alright Flora, I think my strength is already surpassed the ice wolves.”
Varn judgment may not be correct. Varn speed may still fall behind half a step from the wolves’ true speed. The wolves’ fangs and claws are also better than his skill in handling his wooden sword. If he wants to fight with the wolves, his chance of winning is around 50%.
“Then master, let’s proceed with a goblin.”
Right now, Varn is already inside the cage while Flora watched from outside. The cage itself wasn’t made to protect the watcher; it is to make sure that the summoned monster won’t flee from the battle.
Varn held his 「dungeon control」 and move to the monster section. He then chooses to summon a free willed goblin for 100 DP.
(Author note: monsters are explained at the chapter 7)
In front of him, a glow light erupted and from within, a goblin emerges. Goblin height is on par with average middle school students. However it was still taller than Varn. Goblins head are bald and their skin is colored green. Their face is also ugly as if a truck has run over it several times. They wear some kind of tunic to cover their lower abdomen and holding a wooden club. Their arm strength was enough to hold the club in one hand and swinging it as if it was paper.
Seeing the scene in front of him, Varn is anxious but not scared. After all he knew that he would be facing goblin. The real problem is when he is entering another dungeon. He won’t know where the monster will appear from, what is the monster, how many of them is coming, combined with traps, monsters are a scary existence that could take away one’s life.
(Author note: this chapter and the last chapters are talking about monsters and traps. I just want to explain that these two are not as simple as people think. The chance of dying is high. This is not some easy dungeon story where people can walk pass traps, killing monster and leave unharmed.)
Right now, Varn’s only weapon is his wooden sword. It might not be enough to kill the goblin but it is sufficient if he want to defeat it.
The goblin swinging his club, he has realized the situation. Goblin is a barbaric creature by nature, they love to raid others and take joy in fights. This goblin knows why he was here. It is to fight the little boy.
“Master, please be careful. Although goblin are a low ranked creature but it could still endangered your life.”
Varn didn’t think much of that. He knew that this goblin is a monster that he summoned. The goblin hierarchy is lower than him so he should be able to deal with it.
Varn moves forward and swing down his sword. The goblin isn’t dumb enough to get hit by his attack. Although Varn has build some strength and his speed isn’t that bad but his technique is all self taught.
The goblin easily deflected his sword and Varn is pushed back because of that. Leaving the room for the goblin to counter. The goblin swing his club sideways and it hit Varn in the stomach. The impact is enough to send him flying backwards a couple of meters and coughed out blood.
Flora is shouting but there’s nothing she could do.
The goblin followed up his attack and is about to swing down his club to Varn that is curled up on the ground.
Seeing that, Varn body become tense. When was Varn experiencing a real life and death situation?
When the villager tried to steal his corps?
Varn still has the wolves with him.
When his village is attacked?
His father and mother are there to protect him.
When he is clearing the traps yesterday?
Yes, there’s a bit of danger.
He started to remember when he is facing the 「arrow trap」.
He remembers that it was dangerous but he has to defeat it. He has a clear goal that he wants to achieve. Take revenge for his parents. As he moves towards the trap, something is clouding his judgment.
He remembers the night where his parents sacrifice themselves to let Varn flee. He remembers asking for help to the guild. He remembers he was sent flying at pain run through his back.
(Tl note: this happened at chapter 2)
The pain, it was the same pain that he felt yesterday. The pain, it was the same pain that caused sadness inside his heart. Why does he feel like this?
As he is seeing the goblin that slowly walked towards him, he finally realized.
It wasn’t anger to take revenge that clouded his mind yesterday. He hates the 「dungeon raiders」 that doesn’t want to help him. He hates the 「dungeon master」 that send his monster to Bruit village and end up killing his parents. But the real reason he was acting weird yesterday wasn’t all of this.
He realized, the reason all of that happened is because he is weak. He shouldn’t blame anyone for not being able to save his parents. It was his fault for being weak. Because of that, he resented himself.
[Power, I need more power, I need more strength. To avenge my parents, to pay back the 「dungeon raiders」, I couldn’t let myself die here.]
The same thing as yesterday happened; Varn seemed to have lost himself there. Suddenly he stands up, ignoring all the pain in his abdomen. He picks up his wooden sword and swings it wildly at the goblin. The goblin was surprised at that but he defended himself pretty well.
Flora can only watch at the scene from the distance. She consulted with the nature and she finally reached into a conclusion. She knows about his background as well as his painful experience. She learned that Varn is in 「Berserk」 state.
As a mutated species, blood mandragora, Flora herself has a skill to make people entered the same 「Berserk」 state. Therefore she knew the reason behind it. It was anger which clouded people’s judgment. Flora doesn’t know how but clearly Varn has caught the sickness which will cause him to enter 「Berserk」 state.
But right now she need to deal with this situation first. The goblin may be pushed back but clearly only Varn that is exhausted. With a simple waved of her hands, roots come out from the ground and impaled the goblin’s body. It is as if the goblin is skewered from every angle. It wasn’t even a skill, it was a simple plant manipulation yet the effect was so tremendous.
The goblin lost its life in this instance and blood spurted out from its body like fountain. Varn who is nearby immediately stopped moving as his target has lost its life and Varn’s body is painted red by now. The roots that impaled the goblin body than returned to the ground, leaving the goblin to lay powerless on the ground.
Suddenly Varn’s regained his consciousness again. Seeing his body covered up in the goblin blood, the goblins body that is full of hole, his head ached when he try to remember what he has done after realizing that he couldn’t let himself die.
Flora comes to him and gently said: “Master…”
Varn looked at her with a sad look and said. “Flora, I know what happened to me that caused me to lose my consciousness. But what happened after that?”
“Let’s clean yourself before I explained the whole thing.”
(Author note: actually I want to stop it here but let’s just continue lol)
“Yes master, the trigger of it is probably pain. Whenever your body is hurt, you enter that state. Last time, it was because of the arrow and this time because of the goblin attack.”
Varn finally finished hearing Flora’s explanation.
“I don’t know how you caught the disease but it can be cured. It is simply by eliminating the source of the anger. Is it the werewolves that killed your parents? Is it the 「dungeon raiders」 that refused to help? Is it the villager that tried to snatch your corps (well, I’ve solved that problem though)? We just need to kill them. However if the cause of the anger is the 「dungeon master」 on Bruit village, it may take a while for you to personally clear it. But if you let me, I am willing to sacrifice my own life and try to kill him for you master.”
Varn recalled his memory. Did he angry at them? Of course but he hates himself more than that. The statement quickly focused on him.
Why am I so weak that my parents died for me?
Why am I so weak so the 「dungeon raiders」 won’t help me?
Why am I so weak until I allowed a 「dungeon master」 to do as he pleases?
An execration pain ran through his heart.
Suddenly, Varn is going to enter the 「Berserk」 state.
“Master, please get a hold of yourself.”
“Flora, can you kill me?”
That was Varn last word before he entered his 「Berserk」 state.
Flora was stupefied hearing that. Why is Varn asking her to kill him?
“Master… are you blaming yourself?”
Flora quickly realized the situation. It was easy to cure the problem if it was someone else fault. Just simply killed them. But what could she do if the one who caused it is the person itself?
Varn is standing up, take a small kitchen knife that he used to cut vegetables and aimed it at his own neck. He is going to kill himself. Flora quickly hugged Varn’s body before he gone out of control.
“Master, please regain your consciousness.”
“Argggg… This is my fault. My parent’s death, it’s all because of me. I’m powerless. I’m weak. That is the real reason my parents die.”
“No, master. You mustn’t think like that.”
Flora is struggling to hold him back. Someone who entered 「Berserk」 state will lose their mind but in return their body will be stronger, driven by anger.
“Master, please stop.”
“There’s nothing I can do anymore. My parent is dead and that is my fault. Now, I have no one else.”
“Master, please there’s still something you can do. Avenge your parents’ death. And you have me here. You are not alone. You have Alpha, Omega and the wolves.”
However Varn is still trying to kill himself.
“Master, yes, it may be your fault for being weak, but it wasn’t your fault that your parents died. Master, please listen to me. Master you may be born weak but if you died weak, then it is truly your fault.”
When she said that, Varn body stopped moving.
Yes, it was his fault for being weak. His parents died because he is weak. But if he died right now, nothing will change. His parent’s won’t be happy if he died like this. At least, he need to be stronger before he died so he can face his parents with pride.
Varn then starts to cry within Flora’s embrace.
“Father… Mother… I’m sorry… forgive me for being such a weak child… but I promise you… I will become strong… I want you to look at me with pride when I met you again in the afterlife…”
As Varn cried, he starts to think. What is power? What is strength? How can he become strong?
Will he find out about it when he cleared a dungeon?
Will he find out about it if he teaches the 「dungeon raiders」 that won’t help him a lesson?
Will he find out about it if he avenged his parents?
As he pondered about it while crying, his mind traveled to the distance.
(Author note: what do you guys think? I was trying to describe the point that changes his childish mentality to one with a resolve. I could say slowly but sure the foundation is building itself but what do you think?)